Friday, April 18, 2014

PLACING THE PENNY




  On a mildly peculiar train of thought I've been on, I got to thinking how much I believe increasingly, that we all may have destinies. Well, perhaps not "written in stone" destinies that occur no matter how we seek to block them, but just the same, destinies, that this wonderful universe we live in, steers us toward...sometimes ever so subtly, or perhaps more aggressively. Sometimes this "track" is established early on in life as we move toward goals, but being human as we are, and notorious for interfering in our own good, sometimes it takes a "round about" route.
    I keep thinking of a skipping record for some reason, with the universe's wish for all human beings (as well as all creatures) to be happy and achieve a state of peace and satisfaction. The "skipping record" concept, I believe, is present for us all. It is evident in the way that we sometimes continue repeating the same mistakes until finally the lesson is learned. 
    This "skipping record" concept though, has become very apparent to me, in the culmination of seemingly small instances, that passed by me nearly unnoticed, but in retrospect, were clearly being shown as a path that I believe my higher power was mapping for me...trying to steer me toward. 
    When I was a little girl, I remember my dad always placing a penny or two on the cartridge that holds the needle at the end of the tone arm. It sometimes assisted in keeping the "needle" in the "groove" in order to maintain a continuem of the music. I think we need to sometimes place those pennies there...to straighten out our thinking, our lives.
    I am entertaining these realizations at this time, because it seems somewhat surreal to me, how very much my "placement of pennies" has helped me see my road to happiness more clearly. I can "see" the "skipping" of the record now looking back. I am suddenly aware of the fact that there has been a force at work in my life...you call it what you desire to, and so will I...none of us really knows. 
    Two years ago I was put into closer contact with someone I'd heard of, but in no way knew. Through an endeavor...one which was shown to me as a way to expand my horizons, have some fun, enjoy my newfound freedom. Fleeting thoughts of admiration.
    Skipping record...association with a friend of a friend...on two seperate occasions...contact later leading to more contact.
    Of all the people I come into contact with in this town of myriad strangers to me...why these?
    Meeting people you really don't know at all...but suddenly in the midst of things...all making sense.
    The universe is a strange thing indeed. Finding the greatest gift on earth, besides the health of my family...a "skipping record" that repeated over and over in subtle ways, until some blatent sign just had to present itself (because I am somewhat thick-headed)and I now realize that my universe has a distinct desire to make all beings happy and satisfied...as it did me...and we all but need to be receptive...
    
    

Tuesday, April 15, 2014

COFFEE PROMISE





COFFEE PROMISE
Sleepy smiles and morning kisses; 
I remember
the first time,
bringing it like a warm sweet drug,
A cup hot to touch...
A hug warm and happy...
Eyes looking at you
whispering love,
as lips say thank you
And hands reach out.
Brought not due to requirement
but due to want...
Desire.
Not every morning the sun will shine.
We will get rained on.
It happens...
But no matter what any day brings,
Or how any night unravels
in good or bad;
No matter if there's ever
a quarrel,
or mistaken hurt feeling...
I will always bring that hot cup
Every morning I wake
and you're beside me...
A symbol of my love,
and of bright new mornings,
a vow...
Like old people never going to bed angry,
And never withholding "I love you"
A promise of always...



-K.M.Q.F.
4/15/14

Friday, March 28, 2014

Falling in Love


Falling in love
is not about losing your footing,
tripping and landing topsy-turvy at some destination labeled as such,
where you see all there is
and forever will be and abide from then on,
in a happy place. 
Falling in love
is a process of powerless moments
when your heart makes decisions your soul stamps with approval.
It is believing each day you have fallen so completely,
only to find yourself plunging deeper all over again
with some new thought,
word or glance.
Its thinking,
"I was sure I'd fallen, but perhaps not,
because its at this moment I am TRULY falling in love!"

...and that moment keeps repeating every day...

F
K.M.Q.F.
3/28/14

I love you TJ Chinaski

Read to Me



Read to Me

Engrossed, amazed, honored...
Warm bread and peach tea...
Heart beating...anticipating...
Sweating glass...and palms
steady breathing,
this night be done,
But not prior to first shaping my thoughts.
He's always doing that you know.
I've been let in through the front door
Directly, not by way of the back.
Was given a pick and,
Sent forth into a gold mine.
His words an intricate pattern
"Slow down" I whisper, alone
Each thought, small phrase
Go back to reread...I must you know.
Oh yes I feel it...
I believe I perceive
Meanings...intent,
Musings... I see now
Do I?
Perhaps my own way
Uniquely shared
That's how art is you know.
The purr of his voice
When first he read to me
Wonderment of a child,
drinking in words...emotions
Lulled only once this way
Passion dripping from every pore
"Will you read to me again?"
That's what love is you know...

K.M.Q.F.
3/28/14

Friday, March 21, 2014

Only in This Love...




The beautiful exchange of lovemaking between two people, so widely abused and wildly misunderstood ...looked upon as a destination... a goal to reach in which every word, action and thought along the way, is intended to move toward. An act anticipated with eagerness and once experienced almost always some degree of disappointing. It is often the same routine whether old or new love...those moments of deep sharing have their sacredness stolen because those sharing are only doing so on one plane...just one physical dimension of their being, and with perhaps only one thing in mind.
But this exchange is meant to be precious. It isn't an activity in and of itself and all about only the minutes spent involved at the height. It is designed to be a culmination...a crescendo mid symphony, where all the music combined and throughout, is equally valuable. It is meant to compliment ...not complete. After the journey of dropping walls has long begun, and two people have felt the rumble in their hearts and minds...the vibrations of one another, the trust, the realization that they have born to each other their naked souls...only then will that most delicate of sensual exchanges, be what its meant to be. It becomes a conversation...like so many, many before it, only words replace with touch. It isn't shy, yet it is hesitant. Time is of essence and not spent like winnings, but rather dropped coin by coin ever so slowly, a gentle dance of love...held in one anothers palms like a trembling newly hatched bird. The windows to the souls...the eyes...are kept connected, and there is only deeper sharing of what is already known.
I believe that in this light...and only in this way...is this precious collection of moments, capable of being what nature intended...and what two souls will never tire of or take for granted...only in this love.

K.M.Q.F.
3/14/14

MISSING...




Missing someone...
wishing,
I didn't feel so very captive to a feeling...
but loving it just the same.
Missing someone so badly...
wanting them with me each and every moment...
silly
schoolgirl stuff
really?
Is it wrong to be in love?
To want someone there with their warmth
and love...
no...
And missing as well
someone whose presence I will never feel again
physically,
but who I feel every day
all around me.
A connection I can't explain.
I so wish that two most special people in my life
could be together
to talk.
It would be then,
that heaven would be realized.

k.m.q.f.
3/20/14

Thursday, March 6, 2014

Inspiration




INSPIRATION
Creative juices flowing
Ideas rapidly thickening 
as though a plot,
but wanting to keep this one simple.
Its good that canvas was buy one get one free, 
as painting number two 
is already taking shape 
in my imagination.
So typical of me to have more than one,
sometimes two or three
sets of tracks
rambling through my brain.
Not unlike the night I sat writing
two separate songs
at the same exact time.
Pondering my ideas for "The Embrace"
I smile...
He always picks me clear off the floor
each time we meet again....




K.M.Q.F.
3/6/14